‘SNL’: Business News Host Jon Hamm Gives Tariff Tips to Live ‘Check to Check’

Saturday Night Live host Jon Hamm and Ego Nwodim, co-hosts of CTCBC (Check-to-Check Business News Channel), gave tips on how such consumers can adjust their buying practices in light of Donald Trump’s tariffs raising prices.

Hamm, introducing himself as Kenneth, offered a relevant fact about himself: “And this suit is from Kohl’s.”

“Markets are in turmoil,” he said. “Let’s check on the S&P 500, which is down 2.38 percent. The NASDAQ composite is down 265 points. And Dow Industrials are down 2.88 percent. Okay. Does that mean anything to anyone?”

“I’m sure it means something to someone, but sounds like a bunch of gibberish to me,” co-host Tasia replied, pointing to something more appropriate for their channel: “Take a look at boxed mac and cheese, which is up 4.5 percent to $1.59.”

“Also,” she added, “big-ass box of Bisquick is up from $2.39 to too damn much. And candy bars are up from ‘sure, baby’ to ‘put that back!’”

After Kenneth noted that Americans are spending $0 on doctor visits, his colleague noted one investment: “health care alternatives such as ‘Just go lay down,’ ‘Take an Advil,’ and ‘Pray it goes away.’”

The two then turned to correspondent David Hayes (Kenan Thompson) for advice on alternatives to imported goods.

“You can work around them if you’re smart. For example, I occasionally like Perrier water from France. Instead, I drink this American version: Uncle Bubbles,” he said. “Even domestic products will experience some fluctuations. I used to eat Cap’n Crunch cereal. Today I buy this: Sergeant Munch. Lower rank, lower price, flavor bad.”

A substitute for DiGiorno’s, he added, was pizza made by his cousin: “DeVonte.”

Back behind the anchor’s desk, Hayes’ colleagues said sarcastically that the money they saved would go towards their student loan debt.

“Never gonna get it!” they sang.

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